Monday, 15 August 2011

Can't Fathers be home-makers, too?

Today something really annoyed me. I saw a banner ad for a site that had the caption along the lines of; "Preparing our daughters to be home-makers." This caption has really ticked me off.

Why are our daughters being prepared for this role? What about our sons? Can't they be nurturing, caring, loving and understanding home-makers, too? It makes the suggestion that only females can and should be home-makers. And while I'm willing to play fair and bet the site admin didn't mean any harm, I think inadvertently sites like this cause it anyway. 

I have a son, so I take this personally. I am rearing a home-maker. He will learn how to use a washing machine, how to cook a number of recipes, how to sew a button onto a shirt, how to mend a pair of socks and he will be expected to take an active role in duties around the house.

After all, one day, he will be a father. And he will have a home. If that's what he chooses, of course. And if or when that day comes, I want him to make his house a home. I want him to be a home-maker. And to be prepared to be the one who works in the home, rather than outside the home.

And the person preparing him for most of his early learning? His own father. Who cooks, changes nappies, feeds our son, does the shopping and vacuuming around here. Our own home-maker.

So why just prepare our daughters to be home-makers? Our sons need it, too. And none of this 'Modern Man' rubbish, either. It's just normal and natural because being a father is more than about clocking in and out of an office building, coming home, putting your feet up and expecting someone else to do things for you at home.

Being a home-maker is about making a home; where children laugh, sing, learn and play. Where the father has to have the maturity to handle being the head of the household - how can that be possible if he has never been shown what goes into making a house a home?

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